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Presidential Poker

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Long Live the Queen

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State Of The Nation

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Yeah.. it's gotten so bad, the Mount Rushmore presidents are covering their faces out of shame! I don't blame 'em..

Some Presidential Trivia

RICHARD MILHOUS NIXON and WILLIAM JEFFERSON CLINTON are the only U.S. presidents whose names contain the letters C-R-I-M-I-N-A-L.

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The 15 Smartest and Dumbest U.S. Presidents

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Universally and instantly recognizable, the President of the United States – the heads of state and government of the world’s largest superpower, the commander–in-chief of the US Armed Forces, the omnipotent and oft-termed “Leader of the Free World” – requires no long-winded or flowery introduction. What does require clarification, however, are the notions of “smartness” and “dumbness”. What makes someone smart or dumb? Is it their level of education? Their talents? Their actions? Their achievements? Their IQ? Their intellectualism?

Apart from the obvious answer (that it is one’s ability to ask a string of rhetorical questions) “smartness” is a concept that is open to a range of interpretations, so it is conceded that the assessments made in this article are open to debate. However, to stifle Internet debate (a.k.a. “flame wars”) this article will not base its assessment on policy decisions made by the respective presidents, and, furthermore, accepts that the act of holding the presidential office in itself demonstrates some inkling of intelligence.

The Smartest
This section of the article deals with the most interesting of the presidents that can be deemed intelligent. Whilst some might bemoan the lack of Obama or Kennedy, who are undeniably intelligent, the presidents here either have madder skillz or achievements that outshine them.

Thomas Jefferson (3rd President, from 1801-1809)
No matter how one interprets “smartness”, Thomas Jefferson would unequivocally qualify. The principal author of The Declaration of Independence, Jefferson’s talents could constitute a book; the following catalog barely does them justice. During his teenage years at the College of William and Mary in Williamsburg, VA, Jefferson became incredibly proficient in philosophy, mathematics, history, French, Latin and Greek. “Pfft-“, some hipster reader will undoubtedly say, “-Wikipedia knows all of those things- and Jefferson couldn’t Wikipedia like I Wikipedia!” In this obtuse and poorly articulated response lies a valid criticism – the ability to merely retain knowledge from books may not constitute smartness. But Jefferson was more than just book-smart: a polymath – which is a person distinguished in many varied fields, and not an obnoxious exponential equation – he was also an accomplished archeologist, author, inventor, lawyer, musician (talented in the cello, clavichord and violin) ornithologist, paleontologist, poet and speechmaker. And before you interrupt with some obscure insult, hipster, his architectural and horticultural prowess was such that he designed the University of Virginia (which he himself founded) and the Poplar Forest. This ridonkulous amount of talent was recognized by later president John F. Kennedy when he addressed 49 Nobel Laureates, “I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent and of human knowledge that has ever been gathered together at the White House – with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone."

John Adams (2nd President, from 1797-1801)
Another Founding Father was John Adams, whose dinners with Jefferson (amongst others) resulted in the American Declaration of Independence, the screenplay to the 1996 blockbuster smash hit starring Will Smith, the document where the American colonies announced and justified their secession from the British Empire. With his polymathic fingers in every pie, it is unsurprising that it was Jefferson’s hand that predominantly penned the Declaration, but it was John Adams who championed it in Congressional debates. Adams’ oratory was so dedicated and effective that Jefferson wrote in a letter, “No man better merited, than Mr. John Adams to hold a most conspicuous place in the design. He was the pillar of it’s [sic] support on the floor of Congress, it’s [sic] ablest advocate and defender against the multifarious assaults it encountered.”

James Madison (4th President, from 1809-1817)
Thomas Woodrow Wilson (28th President, from 1913-1921)
Theodore Roosevelt (26th President, from 1901-1909)
James Garfield (20th President, from March - September, 1881)


The Hybrids
As raised before, the notion of smartness is very subjective; depending on which criterion one uses, one can reach very different assessments. This section considers presidents who exhibited both smartness and dumbness depending on different criteria.

Richard Nixon (37th President, from 1969-1974)
If one uses the Intelligence Quotient test as a determinant of smartness, then Richard Nixon is the smartest, with his IQ of 143, less his ability to avoid making crucial mistakes. This is finding was evidenced by Nixon being the only president forced to resign from office.

Bill Clinton (42nd President, from 1993-2001)
Abraham Lincoln (16th President, from 1861-1865) - Huh??


The Dumbest
This is the section you have no doubt been waiting for - the one that deals with the comparatively less talented presidents. Like tequila shots, the judgments proclaimed in this section should be enjoyed liberally and with a pinch of salt – and one should savor, rather than revile, the burn and the acerbity.

Warren G. Harding (29th President, from 1921-1923)
Perhaps not a household name, Warren Harding is the worst of the first men; he has the ignominy of being ranked America’s least intelligent president. Although the Siena study does not specify how it reaches its conclusions, a consideration of Harding’s conduct during his term yields much insight into this Nein-stein. His presidential term was rocked by scandals greater than either Lewinsky or Watergate: nepotism ran free and many of his friends thus appointed (known as “The Ohio Gang”) were involved in bribery and embezzlement scandals. Although the White House was not subject to the same scrutiny and transparency of today, the shady dealings were so brazen and gormless that they quickly came to light. However, the only thing dumber than these peccadilloes (and it’s not his middle name, Gamaliel) is Harding’s barely hidden consumption of alcohol at private parties in the White House. Why is this dumb? Well, Harding’s presidency coincided with the Prohibition. Also, being apparently handsome, Harding was nominated to try to secure the vote of women in the 1920 election (the first time women voted in America). When it became apparent that his wife was treated as a waitress at these parties, and that he engaged in multiple extra-marital affairs, he disenfranchised and isolated his key demographic.

George W. Bush (42nd President, from 2001-2009)
Of course we saved the best for last. It isn’t really necessary to justify Dubya’s appearance in this section –and nor do we have the space – but it’s good fun to reminisce nostalgically over his well documented failings. Like Ford, Bush graduated from Yale (although he only managed a C-grade average) and also like Ford, perplexing, contradictory or painfully banal self-evident observations (yep, they are a real pain in the ass) emerge, unchecked, from his mouth. But unlike Ford, the sheer rate and frequency of these mistakes were so incredible that recording them went beyond cheap political points-scoring: they demanded cataloging for posterity’s sake, lest future generations forget or disbelieve their existence. A neologism had to be coined to describe them, and so “Bushism” entered the American vernacular. The Complete Bushisms, all 13 pages of them, are available here. As a result, the Siena study found him to be the second dumbest president of all time. And perhaps worse still, not even Google can save him from being considered just a tad slimy.

Calvin Coolidge (30th President, from 1923-1929)
Ronald Reagan (40th President, from 1981-1989) - WTF??
Andrew Johnson (17th President, from 1865-1869)
Gerald Ford (38th President, from 1974-1977)


Obviously I didn't write the article. Also - like most who would read this article, I agree with most of it, but disagree with some of it as well. But that's politics, right? The article is an opinion, a lot of which is based on an independent study done at Siena University. I have included that .pdf file at the bottom of the post, so be certain you look at that, as well as some of the embedded links -- and then, of course, do continue to the full article.. (Includes the details from the other 10 which are listed here.)

All The Presidents' Colleges

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The Net Worth Of The U.S. Presidents: Washington To Obama

Having examined the finances of all 43 presidents (yes, 43; remember, Cleveland was president twice), we calculated the net worth figures for each in 2010 dollars. Because a number of presidents, particularly in the early 19th Century, made and lost huge fortunes in a matter of a few years, the number for each man is based on his net worth at its peak.

We have taken into account hard assets like land, estimated lifetime savings based on work history, inheritance, homes, and money paid for services, which include things as diverse as their salary as Collector of Customs at the Port of New York to membership on Fortune 500 boards. Royalties on books have also been taken into account, along with ownership of companies and yields from family estates.

The net worth of the presidents varies widely. George Washington was worth more than half a billion in today's dollars. Several presidents went bankrupt.

The fortunes of American presidents are tied to the economy in the eras in which they lived. For the first 75 years after Washington's election, presidents generally made money on land, crops, and commodity speculation. A president who owned hundreds or thousands of acres could lose most or all of his property after a few years of poor crop yields. Wealthy Americans occasionally lost all of their money through land speculation--leveraging the value of one piece of land to buy additional property. Since there was no reliable national banking system and almost no liquidity in the value of private companies, land was the asset likely to provide the greatest yield, if the property yielded enough to support the costs of operating the farm or plantation.

Because there was no central banking system and no commodities regulatory framework, markets were subject to panics. The panic of 1819 was caused by the deep indebtedness of the federal government and a rapid drop in the price of cotton. The immature banking system was forced to foreclose on many farms. The value of the properties foreclosed upon was often low, because land without a landowner meant land without a crop yield. The panic of 1837 caused a depression that lasted six years. It was triggered by a weak wheat crop, a drop in cotton prices, and a leverage bubble in the value of land created by speculation. These factors caused the U.S. economy to go through a multi-year period of deflation.

The sharp fluctuations in the fortunes of the first 14 presidents were a result of the economic times.

Beginning with Millard Fillmore in 1850, the financial history of the presidency entered a new era. Most presidents were lawyers who spent years in public service. They rarely amassed large fortunes and their incomes were often almost entirely from their salaries. From Fillmore to Garfield, these American presidents were distinctly middle class. These men often retired without the money to support themselves in a fashion anywhere close to the one that they had as president. Buchanan, Lincoln, Johnson, Grant, Hayes, and Garfield had almost no net worth at all.

The rise of inherited wealth in the early 20th Century contributed to the fortunes of many presidents, including Theodore Roosevelt, Franklin D. Roosevelt, John F. Kennedy, and both of the Bushes. The other significant change to the economy was the advent of large professionally organized corporations. These corporations produced much of the oil, mining, financial, and railroad fortunes amassed at the end of the 19th Century and the beginning of the 20th. The Kennedys were wealthy because of the financial empire built by Joseph Kennedy. Herbert Hoover made millions of dollars as the owner of mining companies.

The stigma of making money from being a retired president also began to disappear. Calvin Coolidge made a large income from his newspaper column. Gerald Ford, who had almost no money when he was a Congressman made a small fortune from serving on the boards of large companies. Clinton made millions of dollars from writing his autobiography.

We analyzed presidential finances based on historical sources. Most media evaluations of the net worth of presidents have come up with a very wide range, a spread in which the highest figure was often several times the lowest estimate. Most sources provided no hard figures at all. Most of these efforts have focused largely on the analysis of recent chief executives. That is because it is much easier to calculate figures in a world where assets and incomes are a matter of public record.

One of the most important conclusions of this analysis is that the presidency has little to do with wealth. Several brought huge net worths to the job. Many lost most of their fortunes after leaving office. Some never had any money at all.

1st - George Washington (1789-1797)
$525 million Rank: 2

His Virginia plantation, "Mount Vernon," consisted of five separate farms on 8,000 acres of prime farmland, run by over 300 slaves. His wife, Martha Washington, inherited significant property from her father. Washington made significantly more than subsequent presidents: his salary was two percent of the total U.S. budget in 1789.


2nd - John Adams (1797-1801)
$19 million Rank: 18

Adams received a modest inheritance from his father. His wife, Abigail Adams, was a member of the Quincys, a prestigious Massachusetts family. Adams owned a handsome estate in Quincy, Massachusetts, known as "Peacefield," a working farm, covering approximately 40 acres. He also had a thriving law practice.


3rd - Thomas Jefferson (1801-1809)
$212 million Rank: 3

Jefferson was left 3,000 acres and several dozen slaves by his father. "Monticello," his home on a 5,000 acre plantation in Virginia, was one of the architectural wonders of its time. He made significant money in various political positions before becoming president, but was mired in debt towards the end of his life.

Continue to the rest of the list..

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