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Saturday, February 5, 2011
Pet Shaming
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I'm not supporting this due to its lack of effectiveness, but I love it nonetheless. I think it would really only work if all the dogs in the neighborhood would be forced to have regular meetings, and they'd all have to wear their shaming signs. Oh yeah, and they'd also have to be able to read.
My Rusty's sign would say "I hike my leg around the house" -or- "I get up on tables looking for food".
Harley's sign would read "I wait for Rusty to leave the room, and then I eat his food before my own" -or- "I suckle on Rusty even though he's not my mother - nor is he female".
Reese's would undoubtedly read "I bark wayyyy too much".
A Good Article About The Most Interesting Man In The World
from Nick Paumgarten at The New Yorker
The most interesting thing about the man who plays the Most Interesting Man in the World, in those TV ads for Dos Equis beer, is that he is interesting, too, perhaps even superlatively so. His name is Jonathan Goldsmith. He’s the one who says, in a Spanishy accent, at the end of each spot, “I don’t always drink beer, but when I do I prefer Dos Equis.” What makes his Most Interesting Man character interesting, besides a preference for spirits, is other traits invented for him by copywriters:
Image Source
At museums, he’s allowed to touch the art... His blood smells like cologne... Sharks have a week dedicated to him... He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels... The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.
These lines are recited gravely by the narrator of “Frontline” over faux-grainy clips of our Man cliff-diving in Acapulco, or splashing down in a space capsule, or lying in a hospital bed stitching up a wound on his own shoulder while surgeons and nurses stand around idly, chuckling at his jokes.
Goldsmith is not this man. Still, he has more in common with him than you do. A montage of highlights from the real life of Jonathan Goldsmith might include (had there been cameras present) footage of him rescuing a stranded climber on Mt. Whitney, saving a drowning girl in Malibu, sailing the high seas with his friend Fernando Lamas (the inspiration for his Interesting persona and, according to Goldsmith, “the greatest swordsman who ever lived in Hollywood”), and starting a successful network marketing business (“I was a hustler, a very good hustler”), which, for a while, anyway, enabled him to flee Hollywood for an estate in the Sierras. Among the outtakes might be glimpses of his stint as a waterless-car-wash entrepreneur. “I love the old philosophers,” he said. “I have a large library. I am not a die-hard sports fan. I love to cut wood.”
Goldsmith, who is seventy-two, related these and other data the other day over an early lunch in midtown. He was accompanied by his wife, Barbara, who, as his agent, five years ago, got him the Dos Equis gig. They’d recently left their spouses and moved in together. They live aboard his sailboat, in Marina del Rey, but had come East to (a) buy a new house in Vermont, to retire to, and (b) spend a week in New York, sussing out what the Most Interesting Man in the World could do for Jonathan Goldsmith.
Click here to continue to the rest of the article - it's really not very long at all.
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The most interesting thing about the man who plays the Most Interesting Man in the World, in those TV ads for Dos Equis beer, is that he is interesting, too, perhaps even superlatively so. His name is Jonathan Goldsmith. He’s the one who says, in a Spanishy accent, at the end of each spot, “I don’t always drink beer, but when I do I prefer Dos Equis.” What makes his Most Interesting Man character interesting, besides a preference for spirits, is other traits invented for him by copywriters:Image Source
At museums, he’s allowed to touch the art... His blood smells like cologne... Sharks have a week dedicated to him... He once had an awkward moment, just to see how it feels... The police often question him, just because they find him interesting.
These lines are recited gravely by the narrator of “Frontline” over faux-grainy clips of our Man cliff-diving in Acapulco, or splashing down in a space capsule, or lying in a hospital bed stitching up a wound on his own shoulder while surgeons and nurses stand around idly, chuckling at his jokes.
Goldsmith is not this man. Still, he has more in common with him than you do. A montage of highlights from the real life of Jonathan Goldsmith might include (had there been cameras present) footage of him rescuing a stranded climber on Mt. Whitney, saving a drowning girl in Malibu, sailing the high seas with his friend Fernando Lamas (the inspiration for his Interesting persona and, according to Goldsmith, “the greatest swordsman who ever lived in Hollywood”), and starting a successful network marketing business (“I was a hustler, a very good hustler”), which, for a while, anyway, enabled him to flee Hollywood for an estate in the Sierras. Among the outtakes might be glimpses of his stint as a waterless-car-wash entrepreneur. “I love the old philosophers,” he said. “I have a large library. I am not a die-hard sports fan. I love to cut wood.”
Goldsmith, who is seventy-two, related these and other data the other day over an early lunch in midtown. He was accompanied by his wife, Barbara, who, as his agent, five years ago, got him the Dos Equis gig. They’d recently left their spouses and moved in together. They live aboard his sailboat, in Marina del Rey, but had come East to (a) buy a new house in Vermont, to retire to, and (b) spend a week in New York, sussing out what the Most Interesting Man in the World could do for Jonathan Goldsmith.
Click here to continue to the rest of the article - it's really not very long at all.
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Friday, February 4, 2011
Sol Wallerstein's 61
Sol Wallerstein was at the country club for his weekly round of golf. He began his round with an eagle on the first hole and a birdie on the second.On the third hole he had just scored his first ever hole-in-one when his cell phone rang... It was a doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in an accident, and was in critical condition in ICU.
The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he was, and that he'd be there as soon as possible. As he hung up, he realized he'd be leaving what was shaping up to be his best-ever round of golf. So he decided to get in a couple more holes before heading to the hospital.
Well, he ended up playing all eighteen, finishing his round, and shooting a personal best 61 - shattering the course record by five strokes, and beating his previous best round by more than 10. He was jubilant...
Then he remembered about his wife. Feeling guilty he dashed to the hospital. He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife's condition. The doctor glared at him and shouted, "You went ahead and finished your round of golf didn't you! I hope you're proud of yourself!"
"While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself at the country club, your wife has been languishing in the ICU! It's just as well you went ahead and finished that round because it will be more than likely your last! For the rest of her life, she will require round-the-clock care and you will be her care giver! She will need IVs; you will have to change her colostomy bag every 3 hours; she will have to be spoon fed 3 times a day and don't forget the hygiene care."
The man was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed…
Then the doctor snickered and said, "I'm just screwing with you. She's dead. What'd you shoot?"
Thanks Jeff!
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