Friday, April 20, 2012

The 9 People You'll See At Every Golf Course

Image Source

The Misogynist
Description: He doesn’t so much enjoy golf as he enjoys having an environment where it’s acceptable to complain about women and crudely talk about sex. Leave a putt short or hit a weak drive? “Come on, Sally! You hit that like a pu***! Nice skirt! Does your husband play?” Hit a putt past the hole or crush a drive? “Whoa! Someone’s wife isn’t giving him enough of the ********! Look at all that extra aggression!” Whatever The Misogynist shoots in a round, put him down for double that number on uses of the terms “old lady” and “ole’ ball and chain.”

Fun Fact: The Misogynist has been banned from 12 courses for trying to feel up the beverage cart girl.

The Rules Official
Description: He has read the USGA rules book two dozen times and has a copy of it in his golf bag that he will display at a moment’s notice. You better not be trying to move your ball out of that mud patch in the middle of the fairway because, according to Rule 13-b(1.4), that particular mud patch, due to its lack of distinguishing marks, does not fit the criteria for “ground under repair.” I mean, sure, if you want to play that way, fine. But if this was the US Open you’d be getting a significant penalty.

Fun Fact: The Rules Official received a severe beating in 8th grade after reminding his math teacher that she had forgotten to assign homework.

The Mulligan Man
Description: He is the complete opposite of The Rules Official. To him, it’s always winter rules … wherever his ball lands, he just finds the nearest and best lie without any sort of obstruction between him and the hole. And then he props it up on a cluster of grass like a tee. Golf’s not so hard! Whoops! Hit one out of bounds again? Just like on the last four holes? Nope! Not really! He didn’t use his 5th hole mulligan yet! And that’s a gimme from 10-feet, right? Well, it doesn’t matter anyway. He’s going to count the putt whether it goes in or not. Put him down for yet another par!

Fun Fact: Despite losing 14 balls during the round, Mulligan Man still managed to shoot 78. Amazing!

Click HERE, or on the Stooges banner image to go see the rest of the article..

Source / Via

No comments:

Post a Comment