Sarcasm

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Idiot-Seeking Missle

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Definition

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Unconditional

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Generation Gap

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What An Idiot

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Drunk Australian Leaves Bar - Tries To Ride Crocodile

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SYDNEY (AFP) – An Australian man was lucky to be alive after drunkenly scaling the fence of a crocodile enclosure and trying to take a five-metre (16-foot) beast named "Fatso" for a ride, police said Tuesday.

The 36-year-old jumped the wildlife compound's fence after being ejected from a pub in the northwestern city of Broome late Monday night, and tried to sit on the back of the massive saltwater reptile.

"He first climbed into a compound containing two female crocodiles, before approaching a five-meter long male called Fatso," a police spokeswoman told AFP.

"The man was bitten on his right leg as he tried to sit on its back. He managed to escape and make his way back to the pub, where an ambulance was called."

Pub manager Mark Phillips said staff told him that the man reappeared at about 11pm with bits of bark hanging off him and flesh gouged out of his limbs.

"They said he had chunks out of legs and things like that," Phillips told thewest.com.au website.

He underwent surgery for severe lacerations, and park owner Malcolm Douglas said the man was lucky to have survived his encounter with the 800-kilogram (1,800-pound) croc.

"The crocodile didn't kill that guy because it was jammed in the corner," Douglas told thewest.

Douglas said Fatso, one of the largest reptiles in the park, could crush a man with a single bite.

An average of two people are killed each year in Australia by aggressive saltwater crocodiles, which can grow up to seven meters (23 feet) long and weigh more than a ton.
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Dude, It's A Shark!

Wait for it!

(Warning: There might be a handful of curse words!)



What a dumb-ass! This ain't a largemouth bass with a hook stuck in its mouth. And even after a full 30 seconds of FAIL, demand the wire cutters! Also demand that someone else cut it out...

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Idiot Mushroom Cloud

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