An Expensive Mistake, It Is

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Confucius Say

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Oops! 10 Great Rock 'n' Roll Bloopers

Mistakes. We’ve all made ’em. Some of us more than others.

Rock stars are not immune to the embarrassment of a glorious clanger, and sometimes these little whoopsies, wonky notes and unwanted warbles can even make their way onto vinyl/tape/mp3 for all the world to hear.

Sometimes they make it through to the listener intentionally, and sometimes they sneak by purely by accident, but however they get to us they’re part of what makes rock and roll so much fun, and what keeps kids wedged between a set of headphones when they probably should be studying.

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So here are 10 of the greatest mistakes that made it to tape:

10. The Beatles – “Helter Skelter” (The Beatles, 1968)
“Helter Skelter” is one of The Beatles’ most frenzied songs – in fact, a case could very well be made that it has a lot in common with the prototypical heavy metal that would soon follow. One of the most fiery aspects of the tune is the intense drum performance by Ringo Starr. According to The Beatles: The Biography, Ringo recorded 18 takes of the drum part on September 9, 1968. The very last take was the one used for the master recording, and it’s also the one in which Ringo performed one of the greatest tantrums in rock and roll, screaming out “I’ve got blisters on my fingers!” at the end of the take. You can hear Ringo’s outburst at 4:24.




9. Joe Satriani – “Surfing with the Alien” (Surfing with the Alien, 1987)
Joe Satriani’s sci-fi tones and out-of-this-world phrasing aren’t just the result of inspiration and perspiration – sometimes a little bit of serendipity and a whole lot of electronic malfunction play a role, too. For the lead guitar tone on Surfing with the Alien’s title track, Satriani used a wah-wah pedal and a harmonizer. The former worked perfectly, while the latter was in its death throes. Satriani told Guitar World, “The sound that came out of the speakers blew us away so much that we recorded the melody and the solo in about a half-hour and sat back and went, ‘Whoa! This is a song, man!’” Then the harmonizer broke down and couldn’t be fixed. “We couldn’t do anything,” he said. “We lost our tone. When we finally got it working again, we weren’t able to recreate the original effect. It just sounded different. So rather than screw up a wonderful-sounding performance that may have had a couple of glitches, we decided to just leave it, because it was just swinging.”




8. Frank Zappa – “Muffin Man” (Bongo Fury, 1975)
Frank Zappa often said he saw lyrics as a necessity that he didn’t quite enjoy. In his autobiography The Real Frank Zappa Book he said he felt that if he had to write lyrics, he might as well make them something that appealed to his particular skewed worldview. Nowhere is this more evident than the monologue at the start of “Muffin Man,” where the text and the voice he reads it in so appeal to Frank’s worldview that he breaks character to laugh at himself (0:48), before saying “Let’s try that again” and giving the line another shot.




7. Megadeth – “Paranoid” (Nativity In Black, 1994)
Megadeth’s take on this Black Sabbath classic was recorded for an all-star tribute which also featured Type O Negative, Sepultura, Biohazard, White Zombie, Corrosion of Conformity, Ugly Kid Joe, Faith No More and others. Megadeth’s version of “Paranoid” was a little faster and a lot angrier than Sabbath’s 1970 original, and the anger was ratcheted up tenfold when drummer Nick Menza continued playing by himself after the song was supposed to have ended (2:23-2:30). Menza is cut off by Dave Mustaine shouting “Nick… Nick …NICK!” – and when he realizes his mistake Menza berates himself with some choice words of his own.



Next: Metallica – “The Four Horsemen” -- Continue to the rest of the article..

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10 Things Not To Do When Gardening

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Digging up flowers instead of weeds. Drowning the tulips. Real Simple readers reveal their growing woes and garden design pros plot out the solutions.

Mistake 1: Planting a Garden in the Wrong Spot
"Last year we built raised garden beds. They looked beautiful—with fresh mulch all around them and even a new spot watering system. But the mulch around the beds is always soggy—even in hot, dry Colorado." --Stacie Perrault Staub, Arvada, Colorado



(John Block/Brand X Pictures/Getty Images)


Garden Fix
Good news: You don’t have to tear out the beds entirely, says Ivette Soler, a Los Angeles-based garden designer and writer of The Germinatrix blog. Empty the raised beds (dig out the plants and lay them on a tarp while you work) and spread a four-inch layer of gravel evenly over the underside of the planters to improve the drainage. Then refill the planters with fresh fluffy organic compost.


Mistake 2: Accidentally Pulling Up Flowers Instead of Weeds
"I planted some lovely perennials one summer. The following spring all the flowers sprouted along with some weeds. I pulled the weeds and lovingly tended to the flowers. I even staked a tall lanky plant that I was certain was going to produce a beautiful bloom. Then, one day my neighbor asked me why I had staked a weed. Turns out, I had pulled out the flowers and left the weeds. Oops." --Lisa Benter Rich, Etobicoke, Ontario, Canada

(Jacqui Hurst/Dorling Kindersley/Getty Images)

Garden Fix
Tracking plants can be tough for any gardener, says Andrew Keys, a Boston area landscape designer and writer of the Garden Smackdown blog who cops to mistaking crabgrass for ornamental grass in his own garden. "The most efficient way to mark your plants is to use the nursery tags your plants come with." Another option: Label popsicle sticks and insert them into the ground near your varieties.


Mistake 3: Not Preparing the Soil
"We neglected to prepare our soil last year and, as a result, we ended up with a whole vegetable patch of plants that either never gave fruit or died." --Lydia Harris, San Angelo, Texas




Rachel Weill/Botanica/Getty Images


Garden Fix
Since soil varies dramatically by region, Keys recommends testing your soil annually to find out what type of soil you have and what it needs based on what you want to grow. (You can pick up an inexpensive at-home soil testing kit at the hardware store; watch this video to see how it works.) Then amend the soil as suggested. No matter what, says Soler, it’s a good idea to mix your soil with an equal amount of organic compost. "It’s the best foundation for your garden—it gives your plants the nutrients they need without overloading them with chemical fertilizers which can deplete the microbial activity needed for healthy plant growth."

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